I'm not having a good day today. I feel that I really need a friend to talk to, but the ones that I do have, this is something that I'm not very comfortable talking to. I feel like the ones that I have would judge me, or would give me bad advice, or it would change my relationship with that friend. I don't want to tell someone what is going on right now to hear "Oh, I'm sorry." I don't know what I want them to say though. . . I want a friend who's exactly like me, so that I know I can believe in their advice, because its what I would do. However I don't know what to do right now, so I guess it is best to confide in someone else.
This is the most that I feel like talking about the subject. Maybe if you don't know all of the details you can have a more open opinion on what I should do. (I said maybe. . . ?)
There is a thought that is going around in my head, and I can't get it out. (No it's not that I'm going to hurt myself or someone else) This thought is scaring me. If it happens I'll be incredibly hurt, and my family will be torn apart. I've cried over the thought, and I just can't seem to shake it out of my head. It's haunting my dreams. It's what I imagine, every word that is spoken to me reminds me of it. I don't know who I can talk to about it. I'm frustrated and unfocused. I can't think of anything else right now. Just the thought of it has ruined a few of the last days for me. If it continues on, because it is getting worse, I am scared what will happen.